Happy? Holidays

"Psychology says - tears can represent sadness and pain, it also says tears can often be a sign of joy, while a smile can simply represent pain kept hidden." Unknown

Holidays are tricky. They come with a lot of landmines, well, at least for me they do.

I do enjoy them, I love to try and surprise my kids with something they never thought they would get. Sophie still believes in Santa, which is so sweet. We spent endless amounts of time discussing how he would get into our new place, because we don't have a chimney. Or, what about the houses that left the fire on? Santa could get burned! We ended up deciding that Santa has been doing this for a lot of years, like a lot of years, since he was around when I was a kid ;)....he knows best.

A very large landmine for me, one that I could not avoid was that I did not have Sophie with me on Christmas Day. We all missed Sophie on that day. She has such a wonderful, busy spirit that just makes you laugh and smile. I missed her terribly.

Everyone I am sure have people they miss at Christmas. Family who don't come home, loved ones staying with their own families, it wasn't just me missing someone.

There is another category to missing someone tho....and that's missing someone who is no longer here. That special loved one who passed. Whether it's the first Christmas or the 8th Christmas, trust me, you miss them all the same. It's no secret I am talking about my dad.

This year he was celebrated by all of us, thanks to our mom. We each received a copy of the book he was working on before he passed away. It's called "Growing Pains" and it's about the "Development of Children's Mental Health Services in Saskatchewan". 

 After my dad passed away, my mom and a few of my dad's friends all helped to finish the book, then my mom got it published. Soon it will be available on Amazon. My oldest daughter designed the cover, its exactly as my dad would have wanted it.

I only smiled thru Christmas this year...because, damn...I knew, under that Christmas tree that there wouldn't be a gift that would relieve the ache and worry in my heart, and the pain in my pelvis...

xox


Big thanks go to...

Lisa P for the "going for the gold purse"
Cards from friends all over
Best Wishes from all of you....

Thank you!